Archive | April 2015

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Historic events deemed not to have happened unless recreated in Lego

Historic events worldwide are to be deemed not to have happened until they have been recreated using Lego figures. The landmark ruling throws doubt on the authenticity of the toppling of Saddam Hussein’s regime and even the outcome of both World Wars. Fortunately, it does mean that there is now absolutely no denying the Apollo […]

Man has night out with phone ruined by friends talking to him

A London man has told of his anguish after a night out drinking with his mobile phone was spoilt by his friends from work constantly attempting to speak to him. Dean Shortspan, 25 of Fulham, had taken his iPhone 6 to a bar close to his place of work last Friday evening, only for four […]

British journalists run out of countries to compare temperatures to – turn to space instead

British journalists are running out of countries to compare the day’s weather with, and are having to look as far afield as Mars and the Moon for their articles. With only 196 countries in the world and 365 days per year, writers have identified a chronic lack of comparable climates, leading to a crisis within […]

Last person still using the word ‘totes’ found on remote island

The last person alive still using the word ‘totes’ ironically or otherwise has been found on a remote island just off the coast of Scotland. Steve Harris, a 32 year-old IT start up founder and herbal tea fetishist was discovered on the Island of Orkney after he posted a photo of a poached egg on […]

The 7 best Bruce Willis movies with an ending in which you find out he was dead the whole time

Bruce Willis is an amazing actor that we all love to watch blow stuff up and run around in a vest and sigh and light cigars. But usually in his movies he flips the script on the audience completely at the very end, when you learn that his character has been dead the whole time, […]

Facebook acquires rights to children’s classic – and has renamed it ‘Share Bears’?

In a surprising move, tech giant facebook has made its first venture into making content for television, beginning with an upcoming revamp of children’s classic cartoon “Care Bears”. Perhaps not so surprisingly however, the California based social-networking site has retitled the name of the show having bought the rights from original owners Mattel; changing it […]

Latest NASA rocket to be powered by GQ readers’ insecurities

Latest NASA rocket to be powered by GQ readers’ insecurities

Cape Canaveral, FL NASA announced this morning that their next unmanned mission, to place a communication satellite in earth’s orbit, will be delivered using a pioneering new rocket that harnesses the insecurities of GQ magazine’s readers and converts them into explosive power. The expendable launch vehicle is a variation on NASA’s Atlas rockets which have […]